The Best Time of Your Life

May through Aug 2005 was the best time of my life.  I'm not sure if life will get any better than those few months.  Jess and I agree on this point wholeheartedly because in the summer of 2005 we fell in love.  Life aligned creating the perfect situation.  We both had expendable income that we didn't have to work too hard for.  We got off work early every day and we had near endless free time.  We even had free maid service and cable.  It really was the perfect summer. 

We both lived in a run down military hotel.  Our room doors faced each other.  In the afternoon we would meet up after work and hike.  We tried every restaurant in town and spent the weekends traveling all over Arizona together.  The weather was perfect.  Every Sunday afternoon huge thunderstorms rolled over the mountain and drenched the desert.  It was the summer we fell in love and it was perfect.

Some of my favorite memories of that summer included hot dog roasts by a shallow mountain lake, many trips to the drive in movie theater and chasing forest fires for the fun of it.  We were absolutely free and we got married just a few short months later.

Today Jess stayed home and helped me pack.  We also deep cleaned JAC's bedroom and Jess helped me move furniture so I could vacuum up long lost Cheerios.  It was a simple day but by mid afternoon thunderstorms rolled in and we both felt nostalgic for Arizona.  Tomorrow we are flying to Texas.  The combination of thunderstorms, desert, the promise of warm weather and lots of free time together has me excited.  We're even planning several trips to the drive-in movie.  Of course we're also taking our kid-free trip to the mountains and I can't help but feel like in some strange way we have re-created Arizona.  Maybe I'll plan a hot dog roast to make the whole picture complete.

The Big Five

Today Jess and I are celebrating our five year anniversary.  I know everyone says this but, "man did that go by fast!"  Its been a great five years.  Some days and months were really hard but overall its been a great five years.  We've been married half a decade!

To celebrate our friend Jayna is babysitting tonight and Jess and I are going out to hear live bluegrass music.  We going to buy a couple of drinks and soak up some great music for free at the Tiffany Tavern.  If I'm really lucky and its warm enough we'll go on a walk by the Potomac River holding hands.

While I'm looking forward to tonight I'm most excited about our upcoming trip.  We are flying to Texas and I've already checked the weather.  I'll be leaving 40 degree northern Virginia weather and working on my tan in 80 degree Texas weather.  I plan to go running every day and spend my afternoons at the park.  I might even go through the drive through margarita line.  Can you believe they sell margaritas at a drive through?  You have to love Texas.

Texas will be sunny and fun but wait things get even better.  Jess surprised me.  He is taking me on a 4 day, kid free trip to the mountains.  It is going to be romantic and awesome.  We are going to sleep in late and eat at  restaurants that don't feature kids' menus.  I think we might even hang out at the hot tub.  I am so excited I can hardly wait!  Of course all of this was made possible by a cadre of friends and family.  I'll specifically thank my mom and good friend Leigh who are watching JAC while we're having fun.

Happy Anniversary Jess!  I can't wait for five more years of surprises and adventures.

Friday Adventure...well sort of

A thought continued to linger in my brain.  I couldn't get rid of it so finally I made a firm decision.  Today, for the first time in 2 years I decided to get a real hair cut.  I just wanted a change and so I made a big change.  I cut 4.5 inches off my hair.  My hair has never been this short and I absolutely love it.  I wish I could post a picture but my camera is broken. 

I know a new haircut is not an adventure for most people but for the last five years (with only one exception) I've been cutting my own hair.  I've worn the same hair syle since high school!  When I told my friend Becca that I was contemplating a new drastically shorter haircut she encouraged me.  She and JAC played at the mall play area while I was in the salon.  We finished the day off with a trip to Chick-fil-a.  It was a great Friday Adventure and I can't wait to show Jess my new look!

Trains, Cars and Old Friens - A Presidential Weekend

The Connelly clan braved record wind gusts and I-95 traffic and headed north for President's Day weekend.  We wanted to see Jess' grandmother and visit our old church near Philadelphia.  I am happy to report the trip was a success.  I was truthfully pretty apprehensive because JAC doesn't travel well.  All of our previous road trips have been a complete and utter disaster.  Our last road trip JAC screamed so much that I considered drugging him so he would sleep.

Our trip to Pennsylvania went perfectly.  JAC slept or looked out the window most of the time.  I thought my kid had been replaced by an impostor toddler who loved car rides.  Jess' grandmother was thrilled to finally get to meet JAC.  JAC was thrilled because his grandmother brought presents.

We also stopped in at our old church, The North Penn Church of Christ.  This is the church we attended as newly weds.  They were extremely kind to us as we negotiated our first year of marriage.  It was great to return because they were just as warm and friendly as I remembered them.  Plus, they gave us homemade bread for our trip home.

We saved one last surprise for JAC.  My kid is a train fanatic.  We took a detour on the way home and stopped in Strausburg Pennsylvania at the Pennsylvania Train Museum.  They had a wonderful collection of old trains and also had a working steam engine.  JAC was so thrilled when he saw the trains that he squealed like a girl and then spent the next two hours giggling.  He absolutely loved every minute of it and was completely worn out when we piled back into the car and headed south to D.C.

This was great weekend road trip.  It gave me hope that some day JAC will share our enthusiasm for road trips and be ready to go on week long roadtripping adventures.

Sharing

Sharing is a common theme around the Connelly household.  JAC struggles with sharing and he doesn't have a sibling to push him around and force the issue.  Sharing seems to be one of those key human requirements that must be practiced consistently.  Lately I have been thinking about sharing because it can be profoundly powerful.  Sharing placing two individuals on common plain - an equal level.  This leveling creates vulnerability but can be foundational to building something great.

Last week my wonderful preacher's wife shared a whole afternoon with me.  It was a gift of time but it was extra special because she shared her love of quilting.  She is an impressive quilter and produces quilts the quality of great art.  Her enthusiasm was instantly contagious and she gave me a rotary cutting mat, quilting ruler and beginners book to get me started.  I have been hooked.  The combination of construction, color and creativity have proved entirely therapeutic.  I am so grateful she took the time to share her craft with me.

Later in the week I received a call from my brother.  He asked my advice on a "non-parenting" subject.  My older brother has been keenly aware that I am sensitive about loosing my identity to the mess of mothering.  He has been astutely sensitive and goes out of his way to ask my opinions on world affairs or public policy.  His vote of confidence in my thoughts and ideas consistently brightens my day.  I am so proud that he is willing to share his confidence in me.  It compels me to be a smarter person.

What have you shared lately?  Have you shared your time, resources, or talents? Has someone shared something noteworthy with you this week?  I want to end this post on a funny note so I'll share a goofy video that most mothers will relate to.  I hope you're having a great day.

Bad, Ugly, Horrible

I just finished my least favorite bi-monthly chore.  I hate this chore so much that I gag when I think about it.  Twice a month I go to the grocery store.  I buy large packages of meat, separate it into smaller meal-sized portions and freeze it.  This saves significant amounts of money.  It is also completely gross.  Another thing I really hate about this chore is that you cannot procrastinate.  You have to complete the meat division as soon as you get home or your refrigerator will be filled with rancid meat. 

I grew up watching my mom divide portions of meat in the same way.  Unknowingly she passed on her near neurotic frugal tendencies.  Today I pondered, "If we had all the money in the world, would I still buy meat in bulk and separate it."  I knew my answer was "Yes."  I hate this chore but I just can't stop.

While you can't procrastinate with raw meat there are tons of other things I readily procrastinate about.  I once took a personality test that said I do my best work after a long bought of procrastination followed by frantic segments of work.  The test provided me a life long excuse.  Today I am procrastinating on completing a large mountain of laundry.  I really want to do my best work on the laundry and thus it will wait until tomorrow.

New Mexico is sometimes called the "Land of Manana." This means it is the land of tomorrow and nothing gets done quickly.  I have heard that parts of Europe share the same motto.  I can't confirm this but I know today I am embracing it.  My floors are disgusting.  My bathroom is worse.  My closet has more clothes piled on the floor than hanging up but I think all of this can wait for tomorrow.

Friday Adventure - Parkapoluzza

When I heard the forecast for Friday I knew we had to go to the zoo.  The weather man predicted beautiful, warm, sunny, spring-like weather.  The weather didn't disappoint.  It was in the forties by nine in the morning.  Unfortunately our car was in the shop and I had to cancel our zoo adventure.

We decided to take full advantage of the great weather.  I declared it "Parkapoluzza" and attempted to visit as many parks as we could walk to.  It was a blast.  Roxy, JAC and I would play at one park until we were bored and then load up and head to another.  We spent all day in the beautiful sun.  I even sat in the sun reading a book, working on my tan in a sleeveless dress and JAC napped.  It was my happiest day of the year to date.

When Jess returned home we ate green chili stew and picked up our car from the shop.  I'll include the recipe for the green chili stew because it knocked my socks off.  It tasted like the stew I ate in New Mexico.  The green chili sort of dissolves and creates a rich gravy.  It was so delicious.  Green Chili Stew 

To finish off our perfect day the whole family took a long walk to buy frozen yogurt.  I checked the weather forecast and I know we have at least one more day of snow in route but it looks like a warming trend is starting.  I feel like I have hope.  I feel like I could sing really loudly.  I think Parkapoluzza was the perfect way to celebrate the warm weather.

Notes on Valentines Day

Every year we do the exact same thing for Valentines Day.  I make heart shaped cookies and Jess buys me grocery store flowers.  This makes us both happy.  I truly believe more people would be happy if they kept their expectations low and found more joy in the simple things.

I ate about ten cookies or maybe it was twelve.  I quit keeping count but I am so excited for warm weather.  Now I can run off those icing covered treats.  I went running today and felt horrible.  I hate having to get back into shape after a long cold winter.

One of the highlights of my Valentines Day was listening to a story about Panda love on Metro Connection.  Metro Connection is a radio show that showcases interesting things about our city.  They did a story about the Pandas at the Smithsonian Zoo.  Apparently, Pandas have a one day a year mating season.  It is very important that these pandas get it just right because pandas are going extinct.  Unfortunately our pandas just can't seem to get the hang of it.  Instead the female pancakes on the floor and the male steps on her.  A team of volunteers have been watching the pandas on video around the clock because they don't want to miss "mating day."  On "mating day" if the pandas can't get the job done science will intervene and the zoo keepers will perform artificial insemination.  Of course I find this story hilarious.  Why do I find it hilarious?  Because I am childish.  I posted the link.  Check it out.   Panda Love

I've been working on finding little ways to let Jess know I love him.  He's working really hard lately and I don't want him to forget how grateful I am for him.  I've left him a card, bought him new socks and taken out the trash several times but I'm running out of ideas.  What simple things say, "I Love You," to you?  My favorite is warm coffee.  Jess makes a fresh pot for me every morning and it is waiting when I wake up.

Saturday with the Connellys

My toes are numb because I tied my shoes too tight and I'm sitting here listening to JAC boss his toys around.  He does this every nap time and I listen to him through his closed door.  Today he is alternating between telling the toys, "NO!" and "TV Off."  Sometimes when I listen to him I wonder if I am really bossy all of the time.

Saturday we took a quick family adventure to the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History.  We had planned on it being a long adventure culminating in a trip to the IMAX theater. The metro ride into town was pleasant.  JAC loved riding the train and was thrilled when we stopped at his favorite metro stop.

The museum was very busy but we braved the crowds and pushed our way to the dinosaur exhibit.  JAC was in complete awe.  I really believe that God made dinosaurs for the wonder of small children and JAC stayed right with his dad as Jess explained the elements of the exhibit.

After viewing the dinosaur exhibit things quickly headed south.  JAC had not napped and quickly grew cranky and discontent.  We decided to head home but first stopped and to watch the elevator go up and down for ten minutes.  I think the elevator might have been JAC's favorite part.

We rode the train home and the minute I locked JAC into his car seat and started the car he fell asleep.  It was a very short adventure but it was an important adventure.  Jess has been studying almost every free moment lately.  I have missed our adventures and while this adventure was short it was great to go do something fun on a weekend again.

Rock Art

On Thursday I was absolutely beat.  I felt like a walking zombie and decided to break my golden rule.  I put JAC in his room for a nap and went upstairs to lie down on the couch.  As a rule I refuse to let myself sleep unless I know JAC is sleeping too.  I've learned the hard way that JAC gets into mischief when he's in his room supposedly napping and I try to keep and ear open for his shenanigans.  Thursday I was just too tired to care.  Within minutes I was out cold and snoring.

When I awoke I took a quick shower and feeling refreshed went to release my wild child from his bedroom jail. I could hear him making happy sounds and didn't feel too guilty about my nap. I opened his room door and JAC was overjoyed to see me. He hopped across his bed and gave me a big hug. I relished the hug for a few seconds and then mid embraced glanced around his room. It was a complete wreck - of virtual disaster zone of chaos. The crowning element of this destruction was his bedroom wall. While I napped JAC found a black crayon and went to work. I didn't even know we owned crayons. He colored 2/3 of a whole wall black. His ambitious scribbling will likely only be removed with a few coats of paint. JAC was completely proud. Now every night before bed he want to show us his art wall. Let's hope his future medium will be oil on canvas.

Friday I took Roxy and JAC on a late afternoon walk. I was surprised when JAC wanted to walk instead of riding in his toy car but it was nice to stroll around the neighborhood holding his little hand. We made a stop at the fire station to look at the fire trucks. A nice fire fighter let us in the garage for a personal tour of the engines. JAC as thrilled. Roxy was terrified. Later we continued on our walk and JAC found a rock he was completely enamored with. It was white and sparkly. I taught JAC how to put it in his pocket. A few steps later JAC found another similar rock. Eventually we were stopping every two feet to pick up rocks and I realized they were not rocks at all. JAC was picking up pieces of rock salt left on the road from last week's storm. I glanced ahead and realized the entire route was speckled with rock salt and I think JAC tried to pick up every piece of it. Our walk took an extra thirty minutes but JAC was absolutely thrilled to return home with his pockets full, bulging with chunks of rock salt.

Friday Adventure! It has Returned.

We took almost a complete month off from the Friday Adventures.  First I was dissuaded by cold and a  lack of imagination.  This was followed by a string of family illnesses and Jess accidentally taking my keys with him to work.  Finally I determined this was the week to resume our adventuring.

My friend Becca suggested we visit the Udvar Hazy Air and Space Museum because it is near her house.   We have been there many times before but it is always a big hit with JAC and has lots of indoor space to run on a cold day.

We started the quick 30 minute trip to Becca's house early this morning.  We were ready to have an adventure.  Everything came to a quick halt as we waited at the same intersection in traffic for 30 minutes.  Traffic was so stalled that the gentleman in the car in front of me jumped out, ran in Starbucks and returned warm beverage in hand.  We still hadn't moved and inch.  We finally made it onto route 66 and realized there was no accident or construction.  We just live in a big city and sometimes things are slow.  We headed west and arrived only half an hour late.

Today JAC was a miracle child.  He was absolutely perfect at the museum.  He walked for two hours looking at aircraft and contentedly holding both of our hands.  I wish I could accredit it to my expert parenting but the cause was overwhelmingly apparent.  JAC  loves Becca.  He wanted to hold her hand the whole time.  He shouted her name over and over in route to her house.  When we stopped for a hamburger post adventure JAC kept repeating "Becca Too!"  I was thankful when he fell asleep moments before we dropped Becca off at her house because I dreaded the impending hysterics caused by Becca's departure.

The Adventure worked out perfectly.  There wasn't one bad moment.  JAC was even awesome while we were stuck in traffic.  It is great to be an Adventurer again.

What I Like About Monday

Monday is the day I clean the house.  The house is always disgusting after the weekend and on Monday I start scrubbing.  By all accounts in my former life I was a complete slob.  I don't try to deny it.  Now that I rarely leave my house and frequently fail to think of anything interesting to talk about other than my kid I have become a neurotic house cleaner.  I'll start on the floors only to find the baseboards compellingly dirty.  By the time the baseboards are clean I can't stand the sight of the sink and have to scrub that too.  By the time I am finished I'm thoroughly exhausted and the house smells saturated in cleaning fluids.  I love the deep satisfaction I feel after cleaning the house.

Lately I have grown to hate play dough. JAC wants to play with the play dough every day and most days I oblige. It is one of my more favorite kid activities. Our play dough has formed into a giant gray ball after hours of use. We store it in a plastic bag not bothering to sort it into separate colored containers. We don't have multiple colors. We have the glob.

Due to frequent use our play dough is drying on the edges. It frays off and leaves play dough bits all over my kitchen floor. There is no remedy and the problem only grows more annoying as people and the dog drag the play dough pebbles throughout the house.

Potty training inspired me to start scrubbing the bathroom daily. Something about seeing a child-sized, frog-shaped potty in the middle of our bathroom makes my skin crawl and I desperately search for the disinfectant. Today I complained to Jess that now I was not only forced to scrub the bathroom daily but the play dough forced me to sweep and mop the kitchen every day too. He was not sympathetic. My husband is a natural problem solver. He simply smiled and suggested we start playing with the play dough in the bathroom instead. Ug! I can't help but love that man.

The Magic Number

This weekend I had a total and complete melt down.  I even cried a bit.  I think I was mainly just tired but in that moment I lost it.  Later that day I went on a run and when I came back my whole world seemed drastically more positive.  Running helps me be my best version of myself.  Something about the endorphins, repetitive motion, and being outside sorts out the thoughts in my brain.  It feels like a complete relief.

It has been a cold winter and after much experimentation I have come to a determination. 40 is a magic number. If it is below 40 it doesn't matter if you dress your kid in twelve layers he will hate riding in the jogging stroller for 45 minutes. In fact within 10 minutes he'll be a crying snot cover mess and you will feel overwhelmingly guilty and return home. You will sigh sadly and wonder why you made the effort to even dress everyone in twelve layers and get out the door.

40 is a magic number. It holds the key to my running happiness and I am excited to announce that the weatherman has promised 3 days this week with a temperature of 40. It's not San Diego or Miami but I'll take it.

The Best of Your Nest

We live in a compact rental house in Arlington, VA and most days we love it.  We have always been renters and most of my friends rent or own small "fixer-upers."  Renting has lots of advantages.  My favorite is being able to call the landlord when the washer floods the basement and not incur the cost personally.  Renting also has its disadvantages.  Renters can't knock down walls, change floor plans or sometimes even paint.  We don't pick out the cabinets or choose the carpeting.  Instead, renters work with the canvas provided and learn to be content. 

This week during my run I was saying thankful prayers for our little rental house.  It has kept us safe and warm.  It is the house where we started our family.  As I ran I made a mental list of the things I love about our house. The list is below.  What do you love about your nest?  This is your chance to embrace all the small flaws and annoyances and list the best of your nest.

1. I love my eat in kitchen.  This winter I have made lots of new mom friends.  While I am generally uncomfortable with most social situations, I love hosting a friend for coffee and lunch in my kitchen.  I feel at ease cooking and talking in our warm sunny kitchen.

2. Compact Size:  I used to long for the wide open floor plan of a Midwest rambler.  Now I really enjoy that the bathroom is only a mere four feet from the kitchen and bedroom.  While JAC takes a bath I can make the bed or check on dinner and still be within a safe distance.

3. Location:  I love living within walking distance of both restaurants and the running trail.  We are also a mere five minutes from Jess' job.  He loves the short commute and I love seeing him first thing after work.

4. Storage:  This house has an unfinished room in the basement.  It is weather proof but not useful for anything but storage.  When we moved in we didn't realize how awesome this feature is.  It is exceptionally nice to be able to easily store seasonal items or off season clothing without worry.  If I ever build a house I'm including a "junk room."

Chronicles of a Sick Kid

I am horrible at caring for sick men.  I can't get over feeling like they are big babies and despite my best efforts to mask it they seem to see right through it.  My inability to conquer this skill apparently applies not only to sick husbands but also to sick little boys.  JAC battled a feverish flu for the last four days and we all suffered. 

Sometimes I hear stories of sick little boys who love to cuddle on the couch with their mothers.  JAC doesn't fit this mold.  On the first day of sickness he wanted to watch T.V and he absolutely didn't want me around.  He banished me to the kitchen and spent the morning consuming massive amounts of PBS kids programming.  I hate to admit that I appreciated the banishment and took the opportunity to read my Newsweek and The Economist cover to cover. 

The second day of sickness JAC turned into a snarling monster completely unsatisfied with all things.  Any attempt to comfort him was met with being hit or kicked.  The magnitude of his bad attitude was met only by the magnitude of never ending snot coming from his nose.  It was REALLY gross.  He resisted any attempt for me to wipe it and I took to sneaking up behind him with a Kleenex.  By mid morning any sympathy for my snot encrusted kid was quickly dwindling as I grew more frustrated. 

JAC really needed a bath.  He was smelly and covered in snot.  JAC fought the bath like a little devil and as I wrangled him into the tub I marveled at how long and lanky my kicking, fighting child had become.  I scrubbed him head to toe and stepped out to check my pot of white chili on the stove.  Moments later I heard loud splashes.  I walked into the bathroom to see JAC flooding the room.  He dismantled his child-sized potty and used it to scoop buckets of water onto the floor.  The water flowed through the bathroom vents and also flooded the basement below.  I cleaned up the mess, took deep breaths, prayed and tried to remain calm.  JAC refused to get out of the bath and because I'm a slow learner and because I was really sick of my kid I went into the kitchen to check on our dinner.  When I returned JAC was standing on the edge of the tub gleefully peeing everywhere.  It was JAC's revenge  for my bad attitude but I had had enough.  I put him in pajamas and threw him in his room for a nap.  He could come out when his dad returned home!

When Jess arrived home we were both very happy to see him.  JAC recognizing that the more sympathetic parent had arrived pushed me away and clung to his dad.  For the next day and half they were best buddies.  They crashed on the couch and argued over T.V selections while eating handfuls of Cheerios.  I hid out in the kitchen clearly unwelcome in the living room.  Jess even taught JAC how to wipe his nose on his sleeve - Kleenex needed.  Thanks Dad!

Sick kids are harrowing but eventually they get better.  I keep trying to remind myself of that.  JAC seems to be on the mend.  The fever broke yesterday and I think despite my husband's talent for sympathy our sick kid wore him out too.  Yesterday, exhausted he took a three hour nap while JAC and I took in some sun at the park. 

I'm Loving It

I just returned from my late night walk.  It has grown too cold to run with a baby so instead I bundle up in six layers and take the dog on a brisk thirty minute walk after the my kid is in bed.  At first I hated walking in the cold but now I look forward to my daily stroll.  It is nice to have 30 minutes of complete quiet in my life every day.  I think I might continue my late night walks even after the weather grows warm again.

I know it is called the "Terrible Twos," but lately it doesn't seem terrible at all. I love teaching JAC new things and it is amazing how fast he picks things up. A few days ago I taught him how to sort the silverware while I unloaded the dishwasher. He loves the chore. I hope I can keep convincing him that work is fun.

My husband has been really busy studying lately but it has been nice to have the T.V off in the evenings. I've been working my way through a book on civility and have found it absolutely compelling. Without T.V I've been able to read through half of my Economist Magazine each week. I feel smarter and dorkier.  I could get used to this.

I can't totally give up T.V and of course I need my daily NPR because I'm hooked on watching the chaos unfold in Egypt. It appeals to my love of disaster and I can't wait to see how the drama plays out. It keeps a bored house wife's life a tad more intriguing.

This weekend my husband received a call that the church needed to be shoveled out. He didn't hesitate. In fact, I think he relished in the opportunity to serve. Within 10 minutes he had JAC in the car and all of our shovels in the back. We had a shoveling party at church and even JAC chipped in wielding his own small shovel. Both JAC and Jess seemed thrilled to be digging in the snow and it was awesome to watch my husband teach JAC about service.

I made some great pumpkin bread. Pumpkin bread goes perfectly with cold weather. I'm heading upstairs to grab a bite. I have a new friend coming over for coffee tomorrow so I have lots to look forward to. What are you loving tonight? I'm loving pumpkin bread, freshly mopped floors, my awesome husband and brisk, cold walks.