The Simple Things

JAC has drastically changed my life. Today I feel overwhelmed by how much more the simple things matter to me. Prior to JAC I had a busy life with a busy job and lots of busy friends. Now JAC has taken over and it has caused me to re-evaluate things.

About a week ago I bought a bag of bird seed hoping that I could scatter it on my front steps and attract some birds. I thought it would be entertaining to watch the birds while JAC and I were stuck inside due to the winter weather. I was right. It has been very entertaining. First, Roxy ate all the bird seed off the steps. Next, I moved the seed to the windowsills only to have the sneaky squirrels come and eat it at night while I slept. Finally, yesterday I found an old bird feeder discarded by a previous renter in our back yard. Jess helped me clean it up and I filled it with bird seed and perched it awkwardly in our Dogwood tree. This morning I looked out and there were two tiny red bird couples. Each pair had a bright headed male and pale brown female and they were eating hungrily from my feeder. I thought they were beautiful! Then as an added bonus the branches were filled by two other varieties of song birds chirping away waiting their turn at the feeder. I savored the moment. I had a hot cup of coffee, a sleeping baby and some beautiful song birds to watch on a sunny day. Just then, Roxy came racing across the yard barking! She was determined to scare off my birds. The birds scattered and she has spent the entire morning posting guard under my feeder. Crazy dog!

I have also found that parenting has introduced a whole new level of worry into my life. While Jess was out of town I could hardly sleep because I was afraid there would be a fire and I couldn't save the baby despite him sleeping in a room just a few feet from mine. This morning JAC was sleeping peacefully and instead of being grateful I was worried that he was too quiet. (Anyone who knows our baby knows he does not sleep quietly but instead makes small sounds and an occasional yelp while he sleeps.) I rushed into his room and pulled his blankets off and touched him roughly so he would jerk awake. He was slow to react - sleepily opening one eye and for a quick moment I worried that he had died in his sleep. Thankful all is well and he is currently screaming for his breakfast but I am quickly realizing why parenting ages you.

On a final unrelated note - last night I registered for the local community college. My close friends and family know I have always wanted to be a physical therapist but have found all the prerequisites I needed daunting. Now with JAC here I have determined to go back to night school. I am hoping by posting this information the people I love most will hold me accountable for going after my dream and encourage me a bit when I get discouraged. I am so blessed with great friends and family. I realize this every day and I am glad JAC will have so many wonderful people in his life.