Know Your Enemy

This morning I woke up with a HUGE headache. It was the kind of headache that hurts so bad that it makes you feel a bit sick to your stomach. All I wanted to do is stay in bed but of course JAC woke up an hour early. I begged God to send me a nanny. When it seemed apparent that Mary Poppins wasn't going to show up on our door step I drug myself out of bed.

In the Army we use a system called MDMP - Military Decision Making Process - to make big decisions. I enlisted an alternate analytical tool. Let's just call it the Mom Decision Making Process.

I analyzed my enemy - one rowdy, wild eyed terror in a crib. I knew JAC has only one true weakness. He loves milk in a bottle. He doesn't get it often because we've been transitioning him to using sippy cups instead.

I walked downstairs, changed his diaper, tossed him a bottle and curled up in a fetal position in my bed. I instructed Jess to do the same before he left the house. If this wasn't bad enough I gave him a third bottle when I limped out of bed half an hour later. I just needed some coffee and some quiet.

The bottle bought me some time. I fortified my defensive. Now armored with coffee and ibuprofen I have to go spring a small child from his baby jail. I'm praying that reinforcements show up soon. Wish me luck...or send a chaplain. My santity might be in question by the end of the day.